I have bananas at home now

So I've already messed up today. My parents have the day off. My dad brought home donuts. My mom's making my absolute favorite food: bun rieu (this vietnamese noodle soup). I think my grandma gave us roast suckling pig too. So far I've had about half a cream cheese croissant, a piece of the pig, and a cup of green tea. And it didn't even really fill me up, but I'm not hungry right now, thank goodness. So I think that's about 300 calories so far.

My goal this week is to just stay under 700 calories before dinner, meaning my daily intakes should add up to be about 1200. With some exercise, I could lose a lb or so.

I have this horrible habit though. When I mess up my plan, I just want to screw myself over even more. I go, "screw this," and let the day go completely awry, because I don't care; I've already messed up, and so I let myself binge and not think twice about it. If it didn't work the opposite way too, as in when I do good I do really good, I would be so screwed, haha. But today, I really don't want to do that. I'll make things work. Messing up a little is like losing a battle. But I can still win the war.

Or actually, tennis is a better metaphor. One small slip up may lose me a game. But if I let it get the best of me, I may lose the set, the match, the championship. Tennis players have to remain calm and keep their minds clear. They can't let their emotions get the best of them, like Zvonareva did. No. You need to overcome that slip up. Let it go. Continue to fight. Keep your mind set on the goal. Even if you don't win, it's a lot more honorable to lose the set 6-7 than 1-6.

I need to keep this in mind.

So, I will eat an apple (80), 2 cups of broccoli (80), and a sandwich with chicken lunchmeat using 70 cal double fiber bread (175), and maybe a boiled egg white (20) for the protein. This will give me a total of 655 before dinner. But for dinner, I know I will eat a whole lot, since it's my absolute favorite (the bun rieu). Honestly, I like it so much, I can't even feel guilty about it. Good thing my mom doesn't make it often. Only maybe three times a year.

Oh, btw, I'm trying to get more fiber in my diet, hence the double fiber bread. Normally I eat this delicious 45 cal one, but I need more fiber.

And yes, this post was just so that I could verbally remind myself to stay on track. Which reminds me, I really need to write an essay I should have started an hour and a half ago..